The Mental Performance Corner: Understanding Communication & Behavior to Build Better Teams

"Alone we can do so little; together we can do so much." – Helen Keller

Teamwork is the foundation of almost everything we know; family, friend groups, sports, work... Teams build a sense of connection and belonging, create an atmosphere to challenge, inspire, learn and grow. They bring a shared determination and motivation as the team drives towards a common goal together. Teams drive individuals forward through a shared effort and focus towards those goals. 

And when teams have the right communication, respect and understanding of each other coming together to meet those goals is not only possible, it is significantly more likely. Effective teams crush their goals, and have fun doing it.

But what about ineffective teams? They’re often dysfunctional, lack respect for individuals, focus on individual goals rather than the team, and have a lower chance of reaching their desired outcomes. In other words, they’re more likely to lose, and not have fun.

One of the core components of my group coaching program is centered around effective teams and how they can create a safe environment for athletes to feel supported, empowered and in a position to constantly learn and grow together.

2 key aspects of having effective teams are communication, and understanding different behavioral styles. Understanding both of these is important for athletes as they learn to work together, and coaches as they learn to coach each individual athlete, and the team as a whole.

Let’s first talk about communication, and understanding what effective communication looks like. Spoiler alert: communication is NOT just about the words that are coming out of your mouth, it’s multi-faceted. Let’s dive in. 

It’s understanding what the person is saying and their intent behind it, and how the receiver perceives it.

There is also how you yourself receive information.

You also have the written word vs the verbal word which also leads to different perceptions.

There is also body language and how we use that to communicate our feelings in situations.

When you’re in any sort of team setting, (sport, professional, family, or otherwise), it’s important to take all of these things into consideration when communicating with one another.

Communication is  a complex set of skills. And like with any skill set, it requires practice to be truly efficient.

That’s why I made it one of the cornerstones of my Coaching Program, 90DaysToClutch. 

The athletes in my program are learning about different behavioral styles and how that impacts the way they communicate with each other. 

They are learning to adjust what they say and how they deliver it based on who they’re talking to and how the intended recipient may perceive what they say, in order to be more effective. 

They also have the opportunity to communicate with each other in written form which is quite prevalent today, and can be tricky. 

Lastly, they are also learning arguably the most important communication skill of all.. Listening. With empathy. You cannot effectively communicate if you’re not actually listening to what the other person is saying. Period. And sometimes that is ALL you will do—listen without trying to “fix things.” Another learned skill.

Learning how to empathize, put yourself in the other persons’ shoes in order to understand how they feel in any given situation, enables you to accept the reasons why that person may feel or think the way they do, even though you may not necessarily agree with them (another learned skill—we don’t ALWAYS have to agree with each other—and that’s OK). 

Once you understand communication and the key role it plays both on the field and off with a team, another layer that is important to dive into in a team environment is behavior. Behavior (not personality) is something that can truly change the way a person acts or behaves when the tension is high in a game and they’re in the zone, when they get on their uniform and are getting warmed up and ready, or when they make a mistake and get corrected by their coach. Understanding your own behavior AND your teammates' behaviors in those situations can make the difference between a team that supports each other, and one that is taking offense, getting frustrated, and lacking empathy for each other.. essentially falling apart when the pressure gets high. 

One of my favorite tools to use to help better understand behavior on the ice, field, court, etc., is the Athlete DISC assessment which was developed from the corporate DISC assessment by Bo Hanson and Liz Mason. From their website, athleteassessments.com: 

DISC Profiling provides practical strategies to improve performance by:

• Developing self-awareness

• Fostering effective communication

• Enhancing more productive relationships

• Tailoring coaching, mentoring and managing

• Identifying how each person contributes their best

• Optimizing team dynamics (getting team chemistry right)

This tool can help a coach, player, parent or teammate to understand areas of strength and areas in need of improvement when it comes to performance. Understanding your own own behaviors can help you to have increased self-awareness—understanding yourself as a player, what you bring to the table, and what you need when you’re in each of the zones. But more than that, when your teammates and coaches are aware of each player’s behaviors, they can help the team feel more connected, and really start performing as more of a unified team that is able to work through conflict, motivate each other and ultimately respect each individual’s contributions to the team.

The DISC assessment is on a scale & is broken down by:

Dominance: bold and skeptical. Typically dive into challenges, are logical and love to win.

Influence: Bold and accepting. Motivated by people, they are often extroverted and talkative.

Steadiness: cautious and accepting. Highly motivated to help others and maintain stability, struggle with change.

Conscientious: cautious and skeptical. Detail oriented and love stability, also driven by logic.

What I really like about this assessment, (and why I use it in my programs), is that it's geared towards athlete’s behavior (not their personality traits), in their performance and is useful at the individual level, team level, and coach level. Specifically, this assessment can help you understand how better to give information as a coach or teammate, how to give feedback, when to give information, the way you say it, the energy you say it with…etc. etc. etc. As a coach, this is super helpful as you individualize the way you coach and respond to each player.

Let’s talk about an example to help this sink in a little more. When a player on your team is a ‘C’, they want every ounce of  information they can get, as well as time to digest it. They aren’t the type to loudly talk about it, they just need time to think. So if I’m the coach, and I give my ‘C’ athlete a quick verbal demonstration of a drill, leaving out a lot of details assuming they understand, they are most likely going to do the drill wrong and immediately feel ashamed and embarrassed by this because they “let everyone down.” If the coach then uses a harsh correction on this particular player, they will essentially lose them for the rest of practice. Understanding that some players need the drill to be drawn out on the board (oftentimes more than once and in different ways), while also leaving space for them to ask questions without judgment, will really go far for these types of players.

Another example, a player who is a ‘D,’ when they’re in what I call their “red zone” can be harsh, and they don’t want to admit they’ve made a mistake. This can cause so many problems in teams, especially with girls teams. Boys deal with things a little differently, but both can take that harshness to heart, feeling like that player is “mad at them,” asking themselves, “what did I do wrong?” But this is just how a ‘D’ behaves under pressure when performing, and knowing that allows the teammate to avoid making assumptions and also to understand what that particular player may need when they are in that particular zone (ie: time and space).  

Even the NCAA is a proponent of the DISC assessment, stating they are “an important resource that some schools and conference offices use to help their student-athletes, coaches and administrators learn more about their behavioral styles and how their individual styles come together in a team environment.”

When it comes to building an effective team, and being a contributing member of a team, it starts with understanding yourself. Once you have a good understanding of yourself, then you can start to understand your teammates. And ask yourself similar questions: “What is Jessie’s biggest strength, how does she like to receive feedback? Is she more dominant and can appear to be harsh? Or does she seem to turn things around with a one-on-one pep talk?” Knowing this, and being empathetic to your teammates is a HUGE asset and can be a game changer if everyone buys into not only knowing and understanding each other, but also committing to adjusting their behavior for the benefit of the team in particular situations. 

But now I want to hear from you! Of all the tools we discussed here in this blog, which one do you think you’ll try first? Make sure and let me know! And if you have questions, please don’t hesitate to reach out on Instagram or email me at [email protected]